We've all been there: You're at a bridal shower and solidly into hour two of watching the bride unwrap gifts. No one wants to "ooh" and "ahh" over the third blender she's unwrapped that day. If you're a bride interested in avoiding this very situation and doing something a bit less traditional, perhaps it's time to consider a display shower.
What Is a Display Shower?
At a display shower, guests bring unwrapped gifts and put them on display with name tags labeling who gave what. This cuts down on the time spent unwrapping gifts and can also be eco-friendly.
Jennifer Spector, Zola newlywed-at-large, explains how it works. "During a traditional bridal shower, the majority of the time is spent watching the bride as she unwraps her gifts," Spector says. "[Display showers] are really designed for brides who don't want to stop the party. But you can't go wrong with either one."
We tapped Spector, Ashley Douglass of Ashley Douglass Events, and Tracey Goldstein, founder and design coordinator of Polka Dot Events, to elaborate on what a display shower is, how it works, and advice on how to throw one.
Jennifer Spector is the director of brand marketing for Zola, a leading online wedding registry, planner, and retailer.
Ashley Douglass is the founder of Ashley Douglass Events, a wedding and event planning company based in Connecticut and NYC.
Tracey Goldstein is the design coordinator of Polka Dot Events, a full-service wedding planning, coordinating, and design company serving NYC, Philadephia, Seattle, and beyond.
Are you a maid of honor who is stumped over how to explain this choice to guests? "A long explanation isn't necessary—usually you can just tell your guests to bring their gifts unwrapped, then designate one person at the shower to place name tags on all of the gifts," Spector says. "It limits confusion, cleanup is minimal, and the bride will for sure know who gave her what. Guests shouldn't feel uncomfortable with a bride's decision to do a display shower. It's a day to celebrate her, plus she's saved them the hassle of wrapping their gifts, too!"
If you're hosting the bash, Douglass suggests keeping it lighthearted on the invite with something like: "In efforts to save time unwrapping and more time conversing, please save your wrapping paper for the next birthday party you attend," or saying it's a "green" shower.
Thanking Your Guests
If you're a bride going the nontraditional route, it doesn't mean you should skip acknowledging gifts altogether, says Goldstein. She recommends that the bride stand up and acknowledge each gift individually. It doesn't have to be much longer than "Thank you so much, Aunt Brenda, for this amazing spa gift certificate; I can't wait to use it!"
"I think it's the right thing to do," Goldstein says. "It's a nice time to appreciate your guests; I still think that's important."
Potential for Awkwardness
A display shower may not be the choice for everyone, though. It can create a sticky situation for guests who are giving an extremely personal (or racy!) gift. "It can be sensitive, and also there may be some gifts guests give that are highly personal and they prefer to hand you a wrapped gift to be opened in private," Douglass says.
"What if a gift is a real surprise and not something you necessarily put on any registry? It may be more fun to be able to unwrap the item, at home or in front of everyone," she adds. "People often give brides undergarments and it may look silly to walk into a shower with a table filled with gag gifts like edible underwear."
What's more, a display bridal shower can set up an expectation that guests absolutely must bring gifts to a shower. "You don't want your bridal shower to turn into a gift-giving showdown," Spector says. "So it's important to mention that gifts, while appreciated, are not necessary."
One Last Thing to Remember
It may have completely slipped your mind, but if you're hosting a display shower, consider how the bride will get those gifts home. Often, brides and the bridal party repurpose gift bags to help carry presents home—if everything's unwrapped, then there are no gift bags lying around. If you're hosting the bridal shower, make sure to have a few reusable bags on hand for the end of the festivities.
The Bridal Shower Etiquette Advice and Planning Tips Every Bride, Host, and Guest Needs
At a display shower, guests bring unwrapped gifts and put them on display with name tags labeling who gave what. This cuts down on the time spent unwrapping gifts and can also be eco-friendly. Jennifer Spector, Zola newlywed-at-large, explains how it works.
To put it simply, a display shower is one where guests bring their gifts unwrapped, save for a ribbon or bow, with a label or tag attached. These gifts are then put on display for all to see!
First, keep in mind that bridal shower gifts tend to be less costly than wedding gifts. The average you should spend on a bridal shower gift is around $50 to $75. If you're especially close to the bride, you may spend upwards of $100. But no matter what, the amount you want to spend is up to you!
The purpose: to shower the bride with good wishes, congratulations, and gifts. It's as simple as that! During a bridal shower, guests come together to celebrate the bride and have some fun. The event usually includes activities, games, and sometimes even a theme.
Key Takeaway: The host is the one who usually pays for the bridal shower. However, if needed, others can help, too. The planning process can be a beautiful collaboration between the maid of honor, the bridesmaids, the bride's mother, and the groom's mother. And yes, even the bride can join in if she wants!
How do you bring gifts to an unwrapped baby shower? If you are attending an unwrapped baby shower the best way to present the gift is by giving it to them unwrapped. The parents to be has specified that they don't want excess wrapping. So it's best to respect their wishes.
That works out at $300 to $800 for a 20-person party but can go as high as $150 per person or $3,000 for a 20-person shower. Based on these estimates and an average bridal shower guest list of 35-50 people, a reasonable budget for a bridal shower is between $350 and $7,500.
Inviting between 30 and 40 people to the bridal shower is the sweet spot, with the understanding that some people probably won't be able to attend. Your actual guest count will depend on where you're hosting the party. If you're renting a bridal shower venue, double-check the guest capacity first.
According to Opperman, bridal shower gifts tend to be less expensive than wedding gifts. "Many people spend around $50 to $75, whereas closer friends and family may spend upwards of $100," she says.
The maid of honor isn't the only option, however. Anyone who is close to the bride—including her mother, sister, cousin, grandma, or future mother-in-law—can host. It used to be that immediate family members were never named as official hosts.
Traditionally, the mother of the bride doesn't host the bridal shower (the maid of honor typically assumes the chief shower-planning role), however, your daughter will likely want you to be a part of the celebration.
According to standard etiquette practice, a bridal shower is paid for by the person hosting the event, who, in most cases, is the maid of honor. However, in today's modern-day age, it's becoming quite common for the bridal party, mother-of-the-bride, and even the bride to chip in depending on who can afford what.
Traditional etiquette dictates that the maid of honor—not the mother of the bride—should host the shower. Nancy is a freelance writer for MarthaStewart.com. Some etiquette rules were meant to fade away into oblivion, like the one about family members of the bride not hosting her bridal shower.
Throughout the day, the mother of the bride ensures that the ceremony and reception run seamlessly. She may be responsible for directing guests to their seats, helping to coordinate the wedding party's procession, and making sure that the music starts and stops on cue.
The Mother of the Groom Can Co-Host the Bridal Shower
Tombs says this event is generally hosted by the mother of the bride or the bride's closest friends. If the mother of the groom is very close with the bride, then she may feel as though it's her duty to pitch in, too.
The idea is simple: instead of wrapping your baby shower gift in an elaborate way, simply bring it to the shower and place it on display (nametags attached optional).
Man-showers or bro-dal showers, events that celebrate a man's first step into marriage, are increasing in popularity. If the future bride can have a shower, why not the groom, too? But do not mistake these for bachelor parties.
A couple's shower is a party thrown for the to-be-weds, while a bridal shower is only for the bride. A bridal shower typically involves the female friends and family members of the bride, who bring gifts specifically for her or her future home with her partner.
Bridal shower etiquette depends on who is hosting the shower. But generally, etiquette says you should limit the number of bridal showers to two or three. If you do have more than one bridal shower, be sure to invite each guest to only one of them.
Introduction: My name is Melvina Ondricka, I am a helpful, fancy, friendly, innocent, outstanding, courageous, thoughtful person who loves writing and wants to share my knowledge and understanding with you.
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